Nonsense at the Who Knows Where
by Shania Maxwell
Summary: Just a crazy fic to say what could happen if everything was just crazy. Hehe I was soooo hyper when I wrote this...This is just humor, not romance!!! or anything else..
1. The Nonsense Begins

Nonsense at the Who Knows Where  
  
Disclaimer: I own nothing!!!!!!!!  
  
Just a story to say I was hyper and so was my sister. This is what happens when we are hyper.  
  
Ch1: The nonsense begins  
  
In the Sahara desert, far far away, a camel strode peacefully by, stopping occasionally to nibble on some grass on its way to the next oasis. But that's a different story.  
  
One night, at the burrow, with a pop, Harry appears. Ron runs down the stairs at the commotion. He saw Harry standing butt naked in the middle of his kitchen and burst into a fit of laughter. Harry then burst into a fit of laughter because Ron was wearing bunny boxers.  
  
The rest of the Weasleys were suddenly awake and ran down the stairs screaming, " Happy Iguana Day!"  
  
Ron turned into a block of cheese. Harry turned into a mouse and nibbled Ron. He ate Ron up and regurgitated him.  
  
*Newsflash! * Ron is now mush!  
  
A magical duster sweeps Ron up and drops him in front of Fred and George who promptly try to put him back together again like a puzzle. Unsuccessfully, he crumples into a pile of mush again.  
  
Meanwhile, a big thump is heard from upstairs. The roof breaks and a half naked Penelope Clearwater falls through the roof. (Awkward silence while all the Weasleys and Harry are staring at her.)  
  
"Fiesta in Percy's room!"  
  
The Weasleys, Harry and Penelope rush to Percy's room leaving the mush aka Ron on a messy pile on the floor.  
  
A surprising sight greets the Weasleys as they reach Percy's room.  
  
He says, "I look great in pink don't I? Pink is the new red!" He starts hula dancing with a banjo and everyone joins in.  
  
Hermione runs in screaming, " The sky is falling!"  
  
The moon laughs, "Eat me!" It yells. Ginny grabs some and eat s a block. Hermione starts eating Fred and Georges' ears.  
  
Mr. Weasley starts a Congo line. Ron the mush, is the leader on Mr. Weasley's head. Da da da da da DA! da da da da da DA!  
  
All of a sudden, they are in a secluded room.  
  
Fred and George scream, "Ahhhhh it's the lair of lord moldy-shorts!'  
  
Harry goes, "nope."  
  
From the distance, Lucius screams, "I've got your top hat!'  
  
Draco screams, "Uh uh father, I got his telbavison!"  
  
"A telbawhatsit?"  
  
" A television," said the GMD. " Sony Television with 34 HTVSID Watts and 24 inch bulbs. It has many good qualities and quality pictures with features..." Goes into a Sony TV commercial while everyone stares at him with their moth hanging opens. He disappears with a pop. (Literally, it was a soda pop commercial, take that Britney!)  
  
Voldemort appears from the bathroom. '/So sorry, what did I miss? Must have eaten something nasty!"  
  
"Tommy" Screams Harry "I love you! Give me back my smiley face sticker!"  
  
'No! Last time you didn't give mine back now it is time for revenge!"  
  
"But I love you!"  
  
" No! Not this time with my moldy shorts! You stole my deranged furby Harry! I love you! Why did you go out with Dumbledore? We could have been great together! Now I will attack you with my heart attack pants!"  
  
Ring Ring  
  
"That's my cell phone, hold on a second!" says Voldie  
  
Everyone sits down and starts playing hand games while eating fatty foods like fat.  
  
"Hi GMD! '  
  
"Hello camel!"  
  
"Darn! You figured out my second cousin half removed was a camel but that's a different story."  
  
"Fine! I need a new weapon!"  
  
"Bye!"  
  
"Bye!"  
  
The good gang stops playing hand games as Voldie hangs up the phone.  
  
"Aye Chiwawa!" screams Percy!  
  
Ron tangos with mush.  
  
Ron screams, "You're evil!"  
  
Neville goes, "Take that Voldie shorts! AYEYEYEYEYEYEYEYEYEYEYEYEYE!!!!!!!!!"  
  
Voldemort moves to the side while filing his nails. "Impressive."  
  
Neville falls in a trash bin and starts chatting with Oscar the grouch. Oscar's little worms attack Lord what's his name and he has to go pee. He runs away.  
  
Everyone is suddenly in the Sahara desert. Just joking.  
  
They are now in the burrow. Percy says, " Let's mambo!"  
  
He returns with Linkin Park and Sum 41 playing simultaneously. Everyone mambos. An elephant walks by.  
  
Fred steps in monkey poo poo. Bill and Charlie start fighting whether conditioner is better than shampoo and which should be applied first.  
  
Percy and Penelope announce, " We just had a baby starfish."  
  
Fred and George look at everyone solemnly and sigh shaking their heads.  
  
"My dear brother," said Fred faking an English accent, realizing he has one and moving to Canada so it sounds cooler amongst the Canadians who say eh!  
  
Ron is still mush. Ginny faints and eats cheese. The rest of the Weasleys eat haggis (yuk!) And Harry is suddenly in bed fully clothed. 


	2. The Nonsense Continues

Disclaimer: noooooooooooo... I wish....  
  
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Chapter 2: The nonsense continues  
  
Once upon a time there were three little bears. Mama bear, Dada bear and baby bear. Goldilocks visited and got eaten. The end  
  
Just joking  
  
So the summer had just begun and Harry lay in bed reminiscing on all the occurrences that happened after he was magically transported to the burrow. He sat in bed and thought about life.  
  
Suddenly, Dudley runs into the room screaming "lalalala." Harry just stares at him... awkward silence....  
  
Dudley says, "When life gives you lemons, take the juice and squirt them in Harry's eyes. HARRY HUNTING"  
  
Harry looks at him suddenly morphing into a frog and eating cream cheese. Petunia Dursley runs in and yells "I just pooed out cheese. Harry frog jumps around eating Neville mush/  
  
Vernon Dursley ate a pie. Harry, suddenly himself, walked to the bathroom. (hey! He had to go!)  
  
ALL of a SUDDEN, (er) Harry is told to eat the grass cus it is tooo long.  
  
"why not mow it" said Harry????????  
  
"cus this is a nonsense story Harry,,," said the authors  
  
"oh. Kay"  
  
Soooooooooo Harry promptly jumped around and asked Dudley to join him in galloping like grizzly bears.  
  
Tumbleweed rolled by  
  
Harry's glasses broke and he said" ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I can see like a monkey in pink shorts"  
  
All of a sudden, the spongebob squarepants theme starts playing and everyone looks around madly for its source.  
  
Draco Malfoy saunters into the Dursleys "Yo~ Potty? Like what's up dog? What's in the house? I'm down with that. Yo dude? Spongebob's on  
  
"Oh Draconis.... You know my heart belongs to Voldemort. "  
  
Harry decides summer is over. So it is now September first........  
  
"Hogwarts time!"  
  
*********************************************************************  
  
Don't kill me! This chappie sux!!!!! I know...... ahhhhhh ! I was lazy and so was my sis and we weren't hyper enough to write a good chapter... but a good one will come later on..... ahhh sorry. Review though.... 


	3. More Nonsense

Disclaimer: I OWN THE MUSH!~!!! LEAVE ME BE!  
  
Thanks to reviewers cus this story is soooooo weird and you make it happy.. (what?)  
  
whispering-dreamer07: ....... Hehehehe it's a secret formula mwahahahahaqhaha  
  
Insane and Crazy: wowie. Like I care, but oranges and jelly make roast beef  
  
beebopodiggity : thankyou!  
  
Ely-Baby: will soon  
  
Reyanna Marie: while where did your A go? Did it run away? It doesn't have legs./....did it melt into mush?  
  
I LOVE MUSH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! kay.... On with the mush I mean story!  
  
*********************************************************************  
  
Chapter 3: More Nonsense  
  
As he looked up, it was a big world. Heck, a shoe was big. Very big. Big big big big big. The worm continued its journey. But who cares about worms....  
  
Owls flew as harry walked. Why? Who knows.  
  
Platform 9 and 10 were right in front of Harry so Harry bashed into platform 8. He jumped on his left foot using his right big toe.  
  
Bananas rolled by.  
  
Filter keys turned on  
  
harry then got a big cloak on and said I am snivvilus the idiot master and snivilllus said I am the boy who died  
  
suddenly Sirius appeared I have a question if vanilla was good and chocolate was bad would you be against chocolate, vanilla or both?  
  
He disappeares and Ron appears with a mullet. "Mullets are the new buzz cuts!"  
  
Harrry jumped in rons hair which was on the platform.  
  
The conductor yells: "Everyone leave so I can go. Er I mean join me in my merriment of faster master blaster uhhhh disaster,.,,,,, hmmmm faster? No I said that train. Just get on !"  
  
Harry sees a first year. "What is your name little boy?"  
  
"It's John Jacob Jingle Heimer Schmit"  
  
Suddnely these jerks from timbucktoo pop out singing "His name is my name too!!!!!!"  
  
Dumbldore appears and does a naked dance  
  
Socks float by.  
  
Dumbldore grabs them and eat the banana  
  
Harry jumps on the plane  
  
Hermione appears eating her book while saying that 128 and 28937 minus 2973494 is just a number with an equivalent of ripped up book pages and mushrooms and coliflower. With raisens  
  
UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH – who knows who said that  
  
Er er er er er said harry  
  
"Get out of the desk!" harry said  
  
"Ahhhhhhhhhh the pens caught in my hair!" Hermione screamed  
  
Fred and George popped out and sang softly to themselves in the tune of yankee doodle till they realized they don't know how to sing it and made up a new song for barney but not bert and ernie cus bert was killed off cus everyone thought that people might think that bert and ernie were gay cus they lived together so a bus killed bert!  
  
Ron starts singing maniac.  
  
James Potter says the moon is made of pizza and he disappears with a splat. \  
  
A big black dog eats raw meet (spelled like this on purpose guys)  
  
A sailor went to see see see to see what he could see see pee/////  
  
Ron decided he had to go to the bathroom and peed through a wall onto the girls side of the compartment. (really happened guys... at camp)  
  
Collecting pee in bottles is fun said an umbrella  
  
The world is spinning  
  
Kayyyyyyyyy I belive in a thing called love... said a giant purple monster..........\\\  
  
The train conducter says that they have to leave cus they are at the hogs warts and time to poo...... so bye bye  
  
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I love toilet humour. Still not as good as ch 1 but oh well.... Enjoy.... Soon a new story up called maurauders mansion./////// think about it.... Surprising events///  
  
Spoiler:  
  
Clue?! I forgot! Crap ! James and Sirius will kill me!!!!!  
  
Who said that? I wonder.... Excited? I am.....  
  
REVIEW 


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